The Geeks are Drifting

AND LO, did they bid farewell to loved ones and mount the steps to the Greyhound Bus, thus declaring themselves to be officially homeless for the next several months. And the bus did rumble and rattle its way through the night with its many passengers, stopping at every unmarked Albertan town along the way to pick up parcels of unknown contents. The passengers did sleep fitfully, confused by a bad Tom Cruise movie and jarred by the perpetual sensation that the bus was about to tip over.

As you may imagine, the overall epic quality of a bus trip requires some embellishment. We jammed ourselves into narrow chairs and I bawled into Glen's shoulder for a good five minutes as the bus started to leave the station. Then we watched Collateral and Antz on the tiny on-board bus TVs, attempted to ignore the odd personal odours emanating from several of the passengers, revelled in the bus driver’s occasional rebuking of drunk passengers or people having nicotine withdrawal crankiness, and made small talk with other passengers. We met a fellow from Suriname, South America, who was taking a holiday in western Canada. We spend a good hour and a half listening in to a rather soap-operatic conversation between two passengers sitting in front of us. They were both in their early 20s, and after they met on the bus they quickly discovered that they shared a lot in common, namely a penchant for drug-fuelled recreation and relationship drama. It was one of the most amusing conversations I have listened to in a long time.

Catching any sleep on the bus was next to impossible, as the chairs don’t really allow you to rest in any position save for bolt-upright. Glen attempted to get creative with his positioning and succeeded in wedging himself into a bastardized version of a full-foetal curl, with his head on my lap and his knees under his chin. A note to all you would-be bus travellers: those travel pillows that are actually small zippable cases stuffed with blankets are a god-send. I’m using a Eddie Bauer travel pillow stuffed with a down blanket that Glen’s mother bought me for Christmas, and it is delightful. Perfect size, good loft, very comfortable, and can be mashed down to the size of a hoagie.

We elected to take the bus because thanks to Greyhound's companion fare discount (buy one full priced adult fare, and your companion can ride for $20) taking the Bus from Edmonton to Vancouver saved us around $300. That represents quite a few nights in a hostel. If it weren't for the companion fare, however, it would have cost around the same for us to fly to Vancouver. It pays to do one's homework and cost-compare.

As we approached our destination, we said hello to the clouds of smog hovering over the Vancouver-area cities like a nicotine coloured blanket. After arriving in Vancouver we had lunch with a dear friend who we can hopefully stay with for a few days when we return. From lunch, Glen and I succeeded on getting separated on the greater Vancouver sky-train. Those doors slam shut hard and fast, and basically slammed shut on Glen’s hand as he was following me onto the train. This left me speeding away while clutching two overpriced fare tickets, watching Glen disappear into a tiny dot on the platform. I got off my train car at the next station and simply waited for his train to turn up, still holding on to his ticket. When his train arrived, I found that he had purchased another overpriced ticket, just in case there was a train attendant checking. The rest of the journey was marked by an incredibly squealy and rattly ride over the Vancouver housetops. The people-watching was only semi-interesting, although we did see a young man with a Beretta gun tattooed onto his neck. Clearly he is a very hardened gangsta and I’m certain he has an enormous penis. Or not.

We are how bunking at my cousin’s house in Vancouver and enjoying their enthusiastic hospitality. It is always lovely being able to visit them and is giving us a good jumping off point for our adventure. We leave for Melbourne on the afternoon of the 13th, and have yet to actually make a hostel reservation for our first night in Australia. I believe I shall do that immediately, as I have the very handy Hostelling International Australia hostel guide at had.

Next stop, Melbourne!

Note: Stowaway the Laptop is a fantastic traveling companion.